Thank you for all your correspondance. I have decided that there is no further need for me to contact you. I hope that if i did have any further questions you would still respond although I do not expect it.
I have a much clearer picture of how I need to progress in my recovery and I do not think that you are able to provide me with that.
I was genuinely hoping from our contact that you would be kind and gentle with me - however I have spent my entire life living a fantasy of a perfect family and kind and gentle you were not. I thank you for your bluntness and time that took to consider my request and many things you said were true and have helped, and believe it or not I have had a looked and evaluated how I can be and will make even more effort now to challenge the behaviour that causes me to be stuck.
I did want to able to meet with you, and to be in your company having forgiven myself and just be able to talk to you adult to adult and just to be able to discuss and literally chat about what happened what happened with no blame and to find some answers that way - and hopefully understand more why I behave the way that I do. It would of helped, but I know that you do not agree so it wont happen. Its a shame because that could of been a message to so many people that abuse may be damaging but there are ways you can deal with it and in a healthy way and i feel that I would of been able to give back some way to world about a bad experience that turned to a good experience and that there is hope where there has been such dysfunction and despair.
If you ever feel you want to contact me or talk to me in the future I have no objection. I will remain on FR until my membership expires. I have only just renewed a membership that lasts for a year and then I will sign out permanently.
I wish you well.
Regards
Angela
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